I hope everyone had a wonderful Easter, full of love and family. I sure did and I am thankful, yet again, for the sacrifice of Christ and the resurrection that has reunited me with my Father. Words cannot describe the joy I feel at knowing my freedom in Christ.
But I digress…
Here’s the sitch…I am all for art imitating life, just not when it’s my art or my life. You see, ever since last semester, when I was broken down and ripped apart and built back up again, I haven’t really known who I am anymore.
I mean, I know what I stand for and I know what and who I believe in. Those things have not changed. But folks, I’m not the same person I was a year ago in more ways than one and while I’m all for growth and change, it’s different this time.
This time, it’s been more abrupt. No subtlety here. Just straight up, blunt like a car crash, ripping off a band aid kind of change. And I haven’t known what to do with myself.
People, I am having an identity crisis!
In the past few months I’ve had my life completely changed. I’ve met my biggest fear, failure, face to face and conquered it. I’ve lost friends, gained them back, lost more, gained them back and made new ones altogether. I’ve had my heart completely shattered and made whole again.
I know, it sounds like a soap opera but I swear it’s just senior year.
Anywho, I’m trying really hard to find who I am and at first I thought that meant getting back to who I was. I don’t think it means that anymore. The girl I used to be was wonderful, and I miss her quite often. However, the woman I am meant to be is someone a little bit different.
The woman I’m meant to be is just as fierce, but fiercely loving and compassionate. I’m just as headstrong, but I try to listen with my heart as well (Pocahontas, anyone?). I'm discovering new sides of myself every day and it’s scary…but I like it.
As for art imitating life, I have not known what to do with this little blog of mine for a while. I was trying too hard to cover too many topics and I haven’t been successful at covering any of them. I feel like I’ve been half-azzzing it for months, even though that hasn’t been my intention.
In real life, I’m discovering who I am and what I want for the future, and I’ve decided to do the same for The Wildflower Way. There will be some great changes to this beautiful space of mine, including (gasp) a change in location!
I hope all of you wonderful people will stay tuned for the new and improved Wildflower because in 2013, we are getting down to business in the right way.
Happy Tuesday, lovelies =)